Tommorow...And Beyond?

"Take me off your worry list.
It'll be better that way.
I'm really fine and there's nothing we haven't talked about.
So, take me off your worry list I said, "Throw it away."
This is what my life is about.
I might have been gone but I never walked out."

                                        -The Worry List by Blue October

Hullo thar.

Today, I had an epiphany.

For most of my life, I've been in an extreme rush to grow up. I've always wanted to be one step closer, one step higher than I already was. Even now, I can't wait to freaking move out of my parents house and settle down in a place of my own.

But here's the thing:
I'm not ready.

In no way, shape, or form am I ready to take life by myself. I want to, don't get me wrong there. But when I think of the future, I can't put myself in that situation. I can't see myself with a job, a family, a house, responsibility. I mean heck, I'll be 16 in less than three months. Three months!! I'll be able to drive on my own, I could get a job if I wanted, I could even legally drop out of school. (Don't worry, I'm not going to.) Plus, 16 is two years away from the age where I finally CAN move out of my parents house, get a real job, go to college, and more important junk like that. But for some reason, I still see myself as a kid. I can't see myself getting a job now, even though a lot (if not most of) my friends already have one. I can't see myself driving to school everyday, even though, again, most of my friends do, and anayway I drive with my permit pretty much everywhere I go. And I definitely cannot see myself living on my own...and thankfully none of my friends do that yet. But still. I better get myself out of this mindset soon, otherwise we may start having some problems...

Sigh...well anyway, summer's almost over and that sucks. Suuuuuucks.
I'm gonna go do something else now. Like go to sleep.
Au revior.